Fuck You Al Gore ...

We all know who he is, and we all remember some of his memorable moments: Claiming to have invented the internet. Sitting like a wooden statue through 8 years of the Clinton Administration. Somehow earning a Nobel Prize for a Power Point presentation.

Fuck that guy.

Don't misunderstand, I'm quite aware that without Al Gore helping to spearhead legislation, today's internet would probably be a very different place. He really was instrumental in getting us to where we are today. I also know that he did the Climate Change movement a great service by slapping his name onto 'An Inconvenient Truth' and parading around like a dancing bear. Despite these things, I'll say it again... Fuck you Al Gore.

Here we are, hip-deep in what has been theorized to be the most critical point in preventing the eventual warming effect that will result in wide-spread flooding and the eventual end of life as we know it, and this chuckle-head is on a no-name network, being a talking head for the Iowa Caucuses, which begs the question...

What happened to climate change?

Did the Republican Presidential nomination suddenly take precedence over the planet? Did we fix it and no one bothered to tell me?

It's actually moments like this that I'm proud to distance myself from both sides of that aisle. I don't have to tow either party's line, and I can sit here and point out the flaws in all of them.

In the conservative ranks, there's a huge call to simply ignore the possibility that we (humanity) has broken the planet. Climate Change is just junk science anyway, right guys? There's no evidence to support it... except that it's not, and there is.

On the liberal side of the political island, the leadership is too damned limp-wristed to act on any of the facts already in evidence. Fantastic! A former VP stood up and gave a speech a bunch of times... how about some legislation, fellas? Why didn't you folks make use of that majority you had in Congress and force the legislation through. No where is Congress required to have 2/3rds majority. Except when the Democrats have the reins.

All we ever get out of any of the asshole politicians are excuses. "We can't because of X, Y, oh and don't forget about Z and baby Jesus, because God told us we could." I've read the bible, and I don't remember anything in there saying that some white assholes begin given permission to rape the planet into another ice age.

It's a sad fact of how Americans are raised to see the world that, unless something directly impacts us in a major way, we really don't get up in arms about it. People in the Great Lakes region didn't get pissed off about Katrina, or the Oil Spill last year, or the outbreaks of tornadoes this past spring. People in California didn't shed a tear for the New England region when a hurricane caught them grossly unprepared.

Maybe if we hosed down every front yard in America with crude oil, or flooded everyone's living room, then they'd get the goddamn message. Until then, I don't think the capitalist machine is going to slow down. It'll just keep on dry humping the atmosphere until the damned thing goes dry as a tired hooker, who is so tired of being abused that she pulls out her .38 and empties all six chambers into the sick fucker who called her a whore for the last fucking time.

Which reminds me of a joke...

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?
...
OH MY GOD!! PLEASE DON'T KILL ME!! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, PUT THE KNIFE DOWN!!AAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGHH!!